The burger looks quite unhealthy - and by unhealthy I mean by eating just one it will take 5 months off of your life - but the commercial is hi-larious, nonetheless. “I just wanted one….” Hi-lario.
Jul 15th, 2008 by Easy Lover | 1 Comment »
Jun 24th, 2008 by The Jerk | No Comments »
While Reggie Bush may not be the fastest man in the NFL, he’s close to it and his name is synonymous with speed; that is why I elected him as the first NFL player to participate in this challenge. It is beautiful in its simplicity and in fan involvement, as well as raising some money for a good cause.
May 21st, 2008 by The Jerk | 1 Comment »
What can I say about Dan in Real Life? Heartwarming.
I’m not a professional movie critic, but to me, Dan in Real Life is simply a heartwarming, brilliantly written movie of a widower, doing his best to raise three daughters while struggling with his suppressed desire to do something for himself.
I, myself, have never been in this situation, so take my “brilliantly written” with a grain of salt, but for me, it was a pinwheel of emotion. I found myself circling the range of sentiment, from happiness to sadness, to discomfort and back to happiness.
The overall plot-line was superb, but, to be critical, I felt the individual characters often behaved irrationally. But as we all know, individuals are irrational. Maybe I’m too used to seeing caricatures in movies instead of dynamic, realistic, sentient being.
f you are looking for a barrel full of laughs, look elsewhere. If you’re looking for American Beauty meets Along Came Poly, Dan in Real Life is for you.
Apr 15th, 2008 by The Jerk | No Comments »
Bring on Cheryl! Bring on any woman sports commentator in the known universe! I cannot take Reggie Miller anymore.
The title of this article is somewhat of a misnomer, in that there is no list, because there needn’t be a list when one commentator is so far ahead of the rest with respect to horrendousness. I feel bad right now, eviscerating another man with words, but this needs to be done.
Mar 30th, 2008 by Easy Lover | 1 Comment »
Twenty years ago, a box seat in Yankees Stadium cost a measly $10. Next year, in the new Yankees Stadium, a similar seat will cost only slightly more - about $2,500.
At least that $2,500 includes free food.
And good luck trying to take a family outing to a ball game. You might as well go to Disney World. It would probably be about the same price, but neither option is worth the money.
It’s comical that even though the economy is in the shitter right now, fans are still willing to shell out some serious cash for their beloved teams, i.e. the Yankees and Yankees’ fans.
Whatever happened to $5 tickets and $1 brewskis? Those were the days.
Mar 20th, 2008 by The Jerk | No Comments »
In the real world, a “power couple” might be a married couple, both lawyers. But in the movies, power couples come in all forms. Below is a list of my top six power couples.
Disclaimer: I apologize to comic book geeks (yes, you Yorick). I used movie power couples; in the comic books some of these super heroes may be divorced or separated, now a single parent, trying to make it in a world with no water because the greed of men brought a great drought and now people live off cigarettes and melted ice caps…yawn.
Mar 19th, 2008 by Clayton | 1 Comment »
Did you ever have to go take a piss, and you have to go so bad that you would literally do it ANYWHERE? Only as long as you get that pee out of your bladder, it’s absolutely necessary. I could recall dozens of times when I have to go so bad that I would do it in a bush in a crowded place with my buddy shielding my back and inconspicuously looking around like we are admiring the berries on the bush. Yeah, that happens all the time.
Well, how about in your 6th grade class? You ask to go, but your teacher decides to make some smart-ass remark, and you’re not allowed. That smart-ass comment was: “Hold it or use my lunch box.” Wow. Talk about a teacher who’s extremely dedicated to making her students sit down and learn what’s in front of them. She’s even willing to sacrifice the hygiene of her lunchbox in order for that to happen.
Mar 17th, 2008 by Easy Lover | No Comments »
Why go to the trouble of paying for a cocktail of various drugs when you can get them for free by simply drinking tap water?! Well, sorta.
New evidence shows just how much crap can be found in our cities drinking water supplies. To be honest, I find it sketchy that these prescription drugs are in the water we drink, even if if is only in “trace” amounts. Apparently the normal rigors of the modern-day water treatment process do not remove the pharmaceuticals from the water supply.
Mar 14th, 2008 by Clayton | 1 Comment »
Just a friendly reminder… You can get your 2008 Summer Olympics updates from SurplusThoughts.com starting on 8/08/08.
Basically, the criteria that will be shared will be gold medal winners, schedule of events, medal counts, etc. etc. If you have any more suggestions, please leave a comment to this post. In the mean time, strap on your red, white, and blue jumpsuit. Do some stretching and calisthenics. And put on your USA game face. The OLYMPICS are just around the corner.
Uploaded are excel spreadsheets containing all of the vital information. Comment if you have a problem with the formatting.
Mar 13th, 2008 by The Jerk | 2 Comments »
I have read and watched the Lord of the Rings trilogy. Both were a while ago, but late one night I began wondering if Gandalf really left it all out on the court.
Gandalf started out Grey. He was the second most powerful wizard in all the land. Upon his new self-appointed nickname, Gandalf the White, and with Saruman out of the picture, Gandalf failed to impress. (Saruman, btw, had whooped Gandalf’s grey butt previously.) Possibly the most impressive thing he did all through the trilogy was creating that large dragon firework. Was Gandalf just a glorified pyrotechnics expert?